Old FA's.....

[Dubya]

It will never happen here, we might offend someone, and nobody is allowed to have their feelings hurt anymore. That's why your kid got a 22nd place trophy at their soccer tournament this weekend, everyone is a winner, even if they suck!!!!

DING DINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDINGDING

Winner winner chicken dinner. F'ng lawyers.

W

 

[Windsor]

I know I'm just a lazy pilot, but I'd rather fly with the granny's than the tranny's, ghetto's, or the gigantics. For the most part the grannys take better care of the guys up front. They'll at least ask if we want something (ice, water, ect...) on every leg. Its the annoying young beeotches that never get us anything and then give you crap if you go into THEIR cart to get ice, that really really suck to fly with.

 

[SpauldingSmails]

I had a similar problem with an FA about a week ago. She couldn't keep pace with the crew as we moved between gates, the hotel van, well everywhere. I don't mean a little slower, I mean we're talking a serious forward progress deficit.

Typical mid-50's empty-nester, bored, looking for something to do so I'll be an FA type. Ultra high-mx, superior whining skills. She was supposed to be flying on the line with the captain and I all month. We gave her so much crap about the size and weight of her luggage ("where did you go? We were concerned you tripped and were crushed to death by your rollaboard.") that her name mysteriously dropped off the line for the rest of the month in crewtrac after the completion of our 4-day. Works for me.

 

[on autopilot]

Comair F/a's Are Hot Hot Hot!!!!

 

[Midnight Flyer]

Nothing sexier than the furloughed TWA flight attendant who looks like white beef jerky and has a long hair growing out her nose.uke:

Hey! Crusty old flight attendants need lovin' too!!

 

[BigMeat]

You have to give the slap test...

Almost near every gate there is a dumpster or two. What you do after the first leg is take her beyond the dumpster and give her the slap test. How you do it is by slapping her really hard, open hand of course. Hard enough to knock her to the ground. If she gets up she is capable....If she stays down finish her off with the crash ax. The dumpster is already stragetically located for her disposale.

 

[COOPERVANE]

Hey! Crusty old flight attendants need lovin' too!!

Yeah, but they gots to PAY!!!

 

[TOOL CRIB]

Would you let an FO fly who said "gee, Captain, I pulled my shoulder playing basketball this weekend... you are going to have to take all the legs as I cannot hold the yolk today."

I wouldn't blame him for not holding a yolk, those dang things are slippery!! That's all I have, thyme to go preflite the airplain.

 

[PBRstreetgang]

If she was 18, beautiful, blond and couldn't lift her bags i would be OK with that.

I am also tired of the old hags that the airlines are hiring. Problem is their husbands are more than happy to send their wives away for 4 days at a time. They are glad to get rid of the old bats, spend evenings watching baseball and drinking beer.
And the old hags just love hanging out with younger pilot people. Better than vaccuuming the old double wide.

Dude,
Really, go read some of the posts on F/I, for them its like babysitting halfway home retards. It's just how your mom gets away from the house and your non-stop Barry Manilow blaring from the basement, while you are sitting reserve.
BaaaHaaa
PBR

 

[Flyerdan]

If you would all just invest in some KY for the old gals they would be able to move around better between the over nights! If you can't at least do that then you probably should get stuck helping with their bags.

 

[Flyerdan]

I wouldn't blame him for not holding a yolk, those dang things are slippery!! That's all I have, thyme to go preflite the airplain.

Nouw thaht is swon uf thee fhunniest phosts yuet!!!

 

[Aviation Geek]

I wouldn't blame him for not holding a yolk, those dang things are slippery!! That's all I have, thyme to go preflite the airplain.

D'oh!!!