Need help from all you wonderful Pilots

[cforst513]

I could offer you some advice. If your plane would crash, you most likely will die. There is a very small chance that you will survive and be a vegetable for the rest of your life. There is also a slight chance that you will survive, but will have serious burns, scars, and disfigurement. I would also say that there is a slight chance that you will suffer from dismemberment and paralisis.

After listing the things that could happen to you if you were to crash and survive, wouldn't it be better to not survive the crash. Instead of spending time hoping you don't crash, hope instead that you don't survive. This advice makes my trips on airplanes much easier.

you are a sick, twisted individual, you know that? sick.

 

[jcrew10]

????Obviously not all are wonderful pilots.....

Well, 1st and foremost, I want to thank the few who did take the time to read and respond and give some positive feedback. I do know the statics and I am learning the facts as I overcome this phobia. I guess I was only needing some technical support of what actually happens during the steps of flying just to reassure the negative thoughts I am experiencing. Such as, it only looks like a few feet away when a plane takes off and quickly banks right - thanks for explaining what the reality is. Any you thoughtful folks - any new stuff keep it coming.

As for ultimately making the mistake to put this on your forum - I must have underestimated the intelligence level of some of you folks. Maturity is probably what most of you lack. I came here because you are professional individuals highly educated and trained. You know, I worked my a$$ for my MBA years back and then decided the stay home and raise children and slowly introduce myself back in the workplace. However, if I ever was approached by anyone who simply needed some advice and I could help, I would step up and lend a helping hand. I obviously underestimated some of you "professionals".

I can only hope and pray for you sick individuals that sent crashed planes to prove a point, and those that laugh along with, etc...I hope there is never a loved one in your lives - wife, mother, sister even daughter that at some point in their lives they face a challenge. And...should they try to overcome their challenge and seek help that they're not disrespected and made fun of as how some of you "funny" folks behaved with my post. If you felt it was beneath you, you shouldn't have posted a reply. I just needed some help.

Thank you once again for those who have heart!

 

[Flying Illini]

jcrew10,

There are a handful of insensitive individuals on this public forum and you just have to ignore what they are posting and only pay attention to those honestly trying to help. The fear of flying is something that must be dealt with very delicately...some realize it, some don't (or don't care). Congrats for facing your fear...that's a very difficult thing to do.
One of my most memorable "students" was afraid of flying. She only wanted two or three flights in an airplane to at least be honest with herself and to face her fear. She didn't want to hold her family back from traveling so she faced up to it. Although we only had a total of three flights together, it was very rewarding working with her. She was physically shaking before the first flight and by the third flight she was smiling and confident in all she did around the plane. We flew three times (she did everything but the landing on the last two flights) and we had 7-8hrs of ground discussion. We did alot of talking because she had alot of questions...and that's good. Ask as many questions as you need to so that you feel confident. As more of her "unknowns" became "knowns" she grew beyond the gripping fear that she came in with.
I'm not saying that she was cured and all was good, she still had anxiety, but it wasn't debilitating nor did it effect her family's vacation plans. She still had the mental demons that she had to supress, but now she had knowledge to counteract them and her mind just didn't run wild like it once did. She told me she still gripped the armrests and her husbands hand pretty tightly on take-off, but she calmed down very quickly and was able to enjoy herself for the duration of the flight.
I don't think there is any quick fix to your problem but you are headed in the right direction, looking for help anywhere you can find a different point of view.

I second the flight training (just ask for an introductory flight and explain your situation...the instructor that you fly with should be able to help you some) idea.

As far as what may be nerve-wracking to you, after take-off as someone said before, turns aren't made below '400'. The airplane usually isn't banked any more than 20-30 degrees. The noises you may hear include flap retraction (and extension for landing) and gear retraction (and extension for landing). You may also hear the engine noise increasing or decreasing. There are speed limits that aircraft must comply with as well as further speed limits (speed up to 250 kts, slow down to 210 kts) that may be imposed by ATC (air traffic control) so the pilots adjust engine power accordingly. THere are also speed brakes that the pilot may elect to use (they are flat panels on top of the wing that can stick up into the airflow to help slow the airplane) and those can create some wind noise too. If you are seated over the wing you will be able to see the flaps and speed brakes as they operate.


Check your PM's...

JD

 

[coolyokeluke]

As for ultimately making the mistake to put this on your forum

jcrew don't let a few bad apples spoil it for you. I too had a student who was terrified of flying. His stepson was flying helicopters for the Army and he decided to tackle his fear head-on. He was physically shaking during the first few flights despite my reassurances and our ground discussion. But he stuck with it. One day we were coming back over a hill in windy conditions, which tends to create turbulence. He was relaxed and enjoying himself and he said "this was one of the best decisions I've ever made. I am relaxed on my business trips and can sleep on airplanes which I've never been able to do, and I really love piloting small airplanes." He continued and got his private pilot's license and is working on his instrument rating. He's considering purchasing an airplane.

I realize that his solution probably cost more than counseling but it worked for him. I think that the more you learn about aviation, in terms of the incredible redundancy of aircraft systems, their dependablility, and the very high degree of experience and training you have in your pilots will set your mind at ease.

 

[Corona]

Well, 1st and foremost, I want to thank the few who did take the time to read and respond and give some positive feedback. I do know the statics and I am learning the facts as I overcome this phobia. I guess I was only needing some technical support of what actually happens during the steps of flying just to reassure the negative thoughts I am experiencing. Such as, it only looks like a few feet away when a plane takes off and quickly banks right - thanks for explaining what the reality is. Any you thoughtful folks - any new stuff keep it coming.

As for ultimately making the mistake to put this on your forum - I must have underestimated the intelligence level of some of you folks. Maturity is probably what most of you lack. I came here because you are professional individuals highly educated and trained. You know, I worked my a$$ for my MBA years back and then decided the stay home and raise children and slowly introduce myself back in the workplace. However, if I ever was approached by anyone who simply needed some advice and I could help, I would step up and lend a helping hand. I obviously underestimated some of you "professionals".

I can only hope and pray for you sick individuals that sent crashed planes to prove a point, and those that laugh along with, etc...I hope there is never a loved one in your lives - wife, mother, sister even daughter that at some point in their lives they face a challenge. And...should they try to overcome their challenge and seek help that they're not disrespected and made fun of as how some of you "funny" folks behaved with my post. If you felt it was beneath you, you shouldn't have posted a reply. I just needed some help.

Thank you once again for those who have heart!

jcrew10: Kudos to you for coming to this board looking for help. Lots of folks don't even take that step-they just continue hating flying.

I wouldn't take the negative posts too seriously. Many pilots (including yours truly) can have a pretty bent sense of humor. (You would probably be appalled at a couple comments I made to a captain I was flying with the day after 9/11.) Most of those are still very good pilots and are more than willing to accomodate you with your problem.

I've had a number of passengers and flight students over the years who were like you. The best way to get over it is as others have suggested: Desensitization. You will likely get over it in a short time.

From my casual observations, I think there is a small percentage of the population that is "wired" against flying. I know of at least one "type A" personality who absolutely wigged out the first time her husband took her flying. No reason that she could find, either.

It might be good, when you talk to the crew, if you could find a deadheading pilot to explain some of the airplane sounds and motions while you are flying. Some of those noises can be pretty startling.

Hope this helps,

C

 

[GravityHater]

Yes pilots have a very twisted sense of humor, that's all that was (actually it's called 'Trade Humor' and every profession has it, you should hear the medical examiners in the morgue). And we have maturity issues... every post here has someone making a joke or trying to bring the topic back around to girls before we get some serious answers... don't take that part of us too seriously. Pilots have tough jobs and this is a form of release.

There is a thing called 'flooding therapy' where you are exposed repeatedly to an unpleasant stimulus. Say you are afraid of flying - book 2 days straight of flying all over the country and by the last trip you will be nodding off during the takeoff roll because you find it all so boring.

 

[TurboS7]

You just need to relax. Look at the wing and think of the aerodynamics at work, it a miracle and very facinating. Just like having a baby. WOW yourself and have a good time.

 

[GravityHater]

Just like having a baby.

I thought the goal here was to emphasize how pleasant it can be! I think you said 'relax' in the same sentence too!!

 

[Uncle Sparky]

jcrew10: Kudos to you for coming to this board looking for help. Lots of folks don't even take that step-they just continue hating flying.

I wouldn't take the negative posts too seriously. Many pilots (including yours truly) can have a pretty bent sense of humor. (You would probably be appalled at a couple comments I made to a captain I was flying with the day after 9/11.) Most of those are still very good pilots and are more than willing to accomodate you with your problem.

I've had a number of passengers and flight students over the years who were like you. The best way to get over it is as others have suggested: Desensitization. You will likely get over it in a short time.


C

..........THAT, is exactly what MY reponse would be JCREW.

When I have "white knuckle" passengers on board, I don't try to quote aviation stats, explain my thorough level of training and experience for all types of emergencies or tell them of the "technological wonders" that make flying so safe these days. I grab the pilots operating handbook and(in plain view of the passenger)say "I've never done this before, so let's see if I can figure this thing out!" Yeah, I know, old joke(for the pilots anyway). Sometimes it sets them at ease sometimes it scares them even more. At any rate, humor is my preferred method. Sorry you took offense. You say that you're trained as an MBA and a full time Mother.....I'm a professional pilot and a Father and I don't know how I would survive without A LOT of humor in my life..

 

[flyifrvfr]

I know I'm sick and twisted, that is what makes me so much fun. Now to be serious for a moment. Life is full of risk. You face this risk everyday, whether the risk is driving to work, walking on a wet floor, or putting a sharp razor against your face in the morning while still half asleep. If you slip while walking on a wet floor and break your leg, you risk infection in the broken bone resulting in amputation.

I'm about to say something so obvious it makes me wonder why people worry about anything at all. Where there is life, there is death. You will die, the only question is when and how. I wake up each morning smiling because I didn't die while sleeping. I don't sit around the house worrying that I just beat the odds of dying in my sleep. I take more risk.

I put that sharp razor against my face, I walk on the wet floor. I drive to work, then fly a small airplane with someone who is trying to kill me. I jump on an airliner knowing that it could happen, I just don't worry about it. I'am no better than anyone else, when things happen to me, I don't ask why me. If you ask why me, you are saying I don't care what happens to others, as long as it is not me, I'am not that selfish.

Get on that airplane, there is a reason that you are getting on the plane. Don't let the risk, albeit small, stop you from living.

Now that everyone knows that I can be serious, look for more sick and twisted posts from me in the future. Remember, life is short, unless of course you are over 100 years old and praying for death, than life is too darn long.

 

[TurboS7]

That is right just like having a baby. I have helped my wife with 7 natural child births at home. No meds all natural. You have to relax that is what the LAMAZ method is all about..........just like having a baby.I stand by my quote-a real woman will understand.

 

[Flying Illini]

I have helped my wife with 7 natural child births at home. No meds all natural.

Dam!
I'm not impressed until you hit 9. j/k, congrats!

 

[jcrew10]

Response to all of you Wonderful Pilots....

Thank you for responding. Honestly, for those who have acknowledged and understood this challenge. My heartfelt Thanks.

I want all of your to understand that by any means, I did not post here to undermine or underestimate the highly skilled and trained pilots. I just went and sought out the best individuals who could help me understand.

I am greatful and It is making perfect sense the reality of it all. Each step forward is a process. The one thing that also have been helping me is that I have found a couple of other sights that you can actually track flights. Every day I get up in the morning and type in my flight. I see the progress it makes during flight. It actually has a graphic that shows where the plane is. Also, I found (don't know how) another place that you actually here the ATC and pilots talking - clearing for landing, taking off, turn left, sorry don't actually know the correct verbiage. Anyway, it is slowly coming together. I have a couple of weeks to go. I have been studying the specific 757 model, and other pertinent information on-line.

As for the Crash and Burn pic from NASA - one day I hopefully will be able to see the humor in that. I guess it wasn't funny at first, but can see how its funny to you. And...breaking the ice by wondering if the pilot can actually read the manual to figure out how to fly the plane - THAT I DID LAUGH! Sometimes that is a great way to break the ice. I do have a great sense of humor most of the time.

Life is to be lived. And, I am frustrated that I spend energy with this fear. Is it the fear of dying - yes. Kind of hypocritcal when I am a Christian. Indeed, no matter where or when, if its my turn to go then so be it. I guess if I didn't have children, (which by the way, that is when it started) I woudn't have this fear of flying.

And speaking of children...Turbo S7 - Congrats for you and your family. They are a blessing. You're 3 up on me....1 Emergency C-section - 3 natural....A real women can take the pain - would I take the pain or fly....That's apples and oranges.

Thanks again, honestly for at least posting.

Take Care,
Sandy

 

[norskman2]

As for the Crash and Burn pic from NASA - one day I hopefully will be able to see the humor in that. I guess it wasn't funny at first, but can see how its funny to you. And...breaking the ice by wondering if the pilot can actually read the manual to figure out how to fly the plane - THAT I DID LAUGH! Sometimes that is a great way to break the ice. I do have a great sense of humor most of the time.

Sandy,

Did you see the movie "Airplane"? If you did, then you might remember they used that NASA footage as the in-flight movie on the plane. That footage and still has been used many times by Letterman, etc., and has unfortunately become somewhat of a comedy staple. (If you haven't seen "Airplane," you might want to hold off until you've got the phobia thing licked or it might give you other reasons to avoid flying!)

On a more serious note, if you haven't discovered them already, the Web has some great resources -- some free, some costing a few bucks.

http://www.fearless-flight.com/
http://www.airsafe.com/issues/fear.htm

Or if you just type "fear of flying" into Google, you'll find a bazillion Web sites. One or two are bound to be helpful.

It sounds like one of the ways you're tackling this is by learning about airplanes and aviation. Ask the Pilot: Everything You Need to Know About Air Travel, a book you can find on Amazon may be helpful.

As others have pointed out, once you study the statistics, the drive to and from the airport is far more dangerous than the flight. But yeah, I know, phobias are not rational, etc. Hey, I'm a pilot, but I'm afraid of heights (quite common among pilots actually). I don't mind doing barrel rolls in an aerobatic plane at 10,000 feet, but put me on a tall shag carpet or the roof of my house and I'll just about pass out.

Good luck!

 

[bin LAAidoff]

Not sure if you've flown yet, and I responded to your post earlier with my two cents. At the time, didnt think to ask for something in return.

Please let us all know how it went. Hope the advice from all helped!

 

[Levidog]

Here, this might help............

http://www.nasa.gov/externalflash/NASA45/40/40image.html

ROFLMAO!! No problem here! Just keep your seatbelts snug and put your head down. The oxygen masks will deploy momentarily.
Reminds me of "duck and cover" to avoid that pesky thermonuclear blast.
LD

 

[SuperFLUF]

Something to think about........

I try to fly every flight with the assumption that a "nervous flyer" like Sandy is in the back.

How about you?

I have flown with a few that don't seem to even take it into consideration, mostly ex-military guys but some civilian as well.

Just something to consider.