Mesa Pilots new Contract
The Mesa pilot union announced that it reached an agreement with management that cuts their pay in half and requires the FO's to clean the lavs. This agreement comes after JO and the management team at Mesa successfully petitioned the FAA to allow trained monkeys to fly their aircraft in revenue service.
Reportedly, test monkeys from an unspecified lab in a foreign country were trained to ATP proficiency and given type ratings on the new 120 seat Canadair Regional Jets. As many as 150 monkeys had passed the test and were slated to be hired into a new all Monkey division of Mesa Airlines called "GO Bananas". Unfortunately negotiations with the Monkey Union hit an impasse when the company refused to provide crew bananas in the contract. A company official said " Hey, bananas are expensive".
When asked for a comment, Captain Peepers the head of AMPA, the Airline Monkey Pilots Association, said "ooohhoooaaaaa!!!eeeeee". He then flung poo at the microphone and ran away.
Phoenix,AP 4:18pm.
NEW VENTURE GIVEN THE GO AHEAD
Mesa has decided to go ahead with their new venture using trained monkeys as qualified pilots. "GO BANANAS" is the new airline flying under the MAG banner. Mesa had originally planned to use their own pilots, who just recently signed a concessionary contract, to help keep costs in check, but decided to go with something that was an entirely "new avenue".
Said one company official " I mean, come on, monkeys flying an airplane, who doesn't want to see that." The company had contracted with a privately funded research lab which successfully trained around 150 monkeys to fly their new 120 passenger Canadair Regional Jets. "All we have to do now is to get them to stop flinging poo" said Zook Knoblislobli, a former chief pilot now in charge of training project.
There was an impasse with the new pilots, represented by AMPA, the Airline Monkey Pilot Union. The company refused to include crew bananas in the new contract, but a compromise was reached when the monkeys were told they wouldn't have to sleep on the planes during their continuous duty overnights. Nor would they be forced to associate with the Howler monkeys being trained as flight attendants. More to follow....
The Mesa pilot union announced that it reached an agreement with management that cuts their pay in half and requires the FO's to clean the lavs. This agreement comes after JO and the management team at Mesa successfully petitioned the FAA to allow trained monkeys to fly their aircraft in revenue service.
Reportedly, test monkeys from an unspecified lab in a foreign country were trained to ATP proficiency and given type ratings on the new 120 seat Canadair Regional Jets. As many as 150 monkeys had passed the test and were slated to be hired into a new all Monkey division of Mesa Airlines called "GO Bananas". Unfortunately negotiations with the Monkey Union hit an impasse when the company refused to provide crew bananas in the contract. A company official said " Hey, bananas are expensive".
When asked for a comment, Captain Peepers the head of AMPA, the Airline Monkey Pilots Association, said "ooohhoooaaaaa!!!eeeeee". He then flung poo at the microphone and ran away.
Phoenix,AP 4:18pm.
NEW VENTURE GIVEN THE GO AHEAD
Mesa has decided to go ahead with their new venture using trained monkeys as qualified pilots. "GO BANANAS" is the new airline flying under the MAG banner. Mesa had originally planned to use their own pilots, who just recently signed a concessionary contract, to help keep costs in check, but decided to go with something that was an entirely "new avenue".
Said one company official " I mean, come on, monkeys flying an airplane, who doesn't want to see that." The company had contracted with a privately funded research lab which successfully trained around 150 monkeys to fly their new 120 passenger Canadair Regional Jets. "All we have to do now is to get them to stop flinging poo" said Zook Knoblislobli, a former chief pilot now in charge of training project.
There was an impasse with the new pilots, represented by AMPA, the Airline Monkey Pilot Union. The company refused to include crew bananas in the new contract, but a compromise was reached when the monkeys were told they wouldn't have to sleep on the planes during their continuous duty overnights. Nor would they be forced to associate with the Howler monkeys being trained as flight attendants. More to follow....
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