Funniest PA Announcements Given/heard...

[AdolphOlivrbush]

Let's here 'em...

 

[Beertini]

How about the Captain at AirTran who plays the harmonica? I think he calls himself Maddog?

 

[-9Capt]

How about the Captain at AirTran who plays the harmonica? I think he calls himself Maddog?

Actually he sings "Bad to the Bone" while playing the harmonica over the PA. Kinda annoying really.

 

[Stifler's Mom]

...I can only imagine how fast the FAs abandon the drink carts to go hide in the galley.

 

[bestpilot]

You jus gots to be professional!

Duuuudes and Duuuudettess and all you peeps dat aint eether a dem too tings, lemmie be welcomin you to da Tranny. Cause we be like all gittin ready to like be takin you all up in dis high-tech aero-machine and stuff from da A-Tee-Elllle to like Pensacola, takin ole Ty Guy back to da crib to see Momma! But befores we do dat stuff, you jus gots ta be gittin dat stuff put away, git you a seat, and buckle up dat ole seat belt so dat we can be leavin da gate, so gitter done!

I be up in da Front here wit ole -9 Capt, and he be like drivin dis sweet new plane up from here to there, so its gonna be smooth, cause dats what he's all about is like makin it like smooth like butter.

Chewie, R2 and like Obi-Wan be tellin you bouts da safety feets a dis fine 7-1-7 so lissen up as dey be givvin you da 4-1-1 in case of a 9-1-1. And lastly but not least, da Chicken's name is Fred! Tanks fer flyin da Tranny!


AWWWWWW YEEEAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

 

[Hair-on-Fire]

Let's here 'em...

hear?

 

[Dr. Rumack]

While holding short last week in PHX the Captain, from an unnamed 'blue topped' 737 said something like: 'Ladies and Gentlemen we are currently number 5 for departure, we build in this delay time to the schedule so we will still be landing on time in xyz. We should be taking off in about 5 minutes or so blah blah blah, blah blah blah, yadda yadda yadda.'
Tower replied: Thanks Southwest ###...
I know, there are those that have and those that will. While I am still one that will I can still poke fun of those that have. Especially when it is Southwest.

 

[ils2minimums]

Michael Flatley would frown...

During boarding about a year ago I was loading the FMS and not really paying attention to the Captain's pre-departure PA. He was a small guy and kinda reminded me of Tim Conway's portrayal of Mr. Tudball from the Carol Burnette show. He was droning on to the passengers about all of the regular boring things like the weather and the stuff they're not allowed to do, such as congregate in the aisles, use the lavs in another class of service, get up while the seatbelt sign is on, blah blah blah... at the conclusion of the 60-90 second PA he ends it in his monotone voice with: "and whatever you do, never, EVER Riverdance, it just looks horrible..."

I cracked up, and I still crack up to this day when I think about it.

 

[lifeguard]

Duuuudes and Duuuudettess and all you peeps dat aint eether a dem too tings, lemmie be welcomin you to da Tranny. Cause we be like all gittin ready to like be takin you all up in dis high-tech aero-machine and stuff from da A-Tee-Elllle to like Pensacola, takin ole Ty Guy back to da crib to see Momma! But befores we do dat stuff, you jus gots ta be gittin dat stuff put away, git you a seat, and buckle up dat ole seat belt so dat we can be leavin da gate, so gitter done!

I be up in da Front here wit ole -9 Capt, and he be like drivin dis sweet new plane up from here to there, so its gonna be smooth, cause dats what he's all about is like makin it like smooth like butter.

Chewie, R2 and like Obi-Wan be tellin you bouts da safety feets a dis fine 7-1-7 so lissen up as dey be givvin you da 4-1-1 in case of a 9-1-1. And lastly but not least, da Chicken's name is Fred! Tanks fer flyin da Tranny!

AWWWWWW YEEEAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

Do you use www.joel.net to translate everything into ebonics or do you make it up on your own? Just wondering.

 

[ezviper]

I don't know what he uses but it bugs the heck out of me every time I try and read it!

 

[Lake Alice]

I just have the guy on the ignore list.

 

[PropPiedmont]

After the regular descent announcement. "...And folks before I forget, we also have a returning 2006 Winter Olympian in the cabin tonight. Seated in seat 3-F is Jason #####. Jason is a #### Airlines employee and also an olympic ice skater. He is returning home from Torino this evening after having won the bronze medal in the all male couples ice dancing competition. Jason, and his ice dancing partner Lance, stunned the judges in Torino after performing the first ever quadruple spin salad toss. We just wanted to congratulate him on his accomplishment and welcome him back to the United States."

 

[Salukipilot4590]

After the regular descent announcement. "...And folks before I forget, we also have a returning 2006 Winter Olympian in the cabin tonight. Seated in seat 3-F is Jason #####. Jason is a #### Airlines employee and also an olympic ice skater. He is returning home from Torino this evening after having won the bronze medal in the all male couples ice dancing competition. Jason, and his ice dancing partner Lance, stunned the judges in Torino after performing the first ever quadruple spin salad toss. We just wanted to congratulate him on his accomplishment and welcome him back to the United States."

:laugh:

Classic...I wonder how many people caught on to that one?

 

[PA-22]

On a clear and smooth day: Ladies and Gentleman, there is no reason to panic, the situation in under control. I'd pay to see the faces of the pax.:nuts:

Colt.

 

[moresky]

By the way, that ******************************-bag that plays the harmonica at airtran in an EAL Scab. What a suprise!

 

[-9Capt]

By the way, that ******************************-bag that plays the harmonica at airtran in an EAL Scab. What a suprise!

Not just a scab, a gutter scab!!

 

[HighSpeedClimb]

Duuuudes and Duuuudettess and all you peeps dat aint eether a dem too tings, lemmie be welcomin you to da Tranny. Cause we be like all gittin ready to like be takin you all up in dis high-tech aero-machine and stuff from da A-Tee-Elllle to like Pensacola, takin ole Ty Guy back to da crib to see Momma! But befores we do dat stuff, you jus gots ta be gittin dat stuff put away, git you a seat, and buckle up dat ole seat belt so dat we can be leavin da gate, so gitter done!

I be up in da Front here wit ole -9 Capt, and he be like drivin dis sweet new plane up from here to there, so its gonna be smooth, cause dats what he's all about is like makin it like smooth like butter.

Chewie, R2 and like Obi-Wan be tellin you bouts da safety feets a dis fine 7-1-7 so lissen up as dey be givvin you da 4-1-1 in case of a 9-1-1. And lastly but not least, da Chicken's name is Fred! Tanks fer flyin da Tranny!


AWWWWWW YEEEAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

Hey Dude, you're in America, try talking like one. uke:

 

[Hutcha]

Hey Dude, you're in America, try talking like one. uke:

Tell me. How does an "America" talk??

 

[PropPiedmont]

Tell me. How does an "America" talk??

Read it again. Then read it again.

 

[V2plus25]

blah blah blah... at the conclusion of the 60-90 second PA he ends it in his monotone voice with: "and whatever you do, never, EVER Riverdance, it just looks horrible..."

I cracked up, and I still crack up to this day when I think about it.

Haahaa, that's awesome. I'll have to remember that one.

 

[The_Russian]

Duuuudes and Duuuudettess and all you peeps dat aint eether a dem too tings, lemmie be welcomin you to da Tranny. Cause we be like all gittin ready to like be takin you all up in dis high-tech aero-machine and stuff from da A-Tee-Elllle to like Pensacola, takin ole Ty Guy back to da crib to see Momma! But befores we do dat stuff, you jus gots ta be gittin dat stuff put away, git you a seat, and buckle up dat ole seat belt so dat we can be leavin da gate, so gitter done!

I be up in da Front here wit ole -9 Capt, and he be like drivin dis sweet new plane up from here to there, so its gonna be smooth, cause dats what he's all about is like makin it like smooth like butter.

Chewie, R2 and like Obi-Wan be tellin you bouts da safety feets a dis fine 7-1-7 so lissen up as dey be givvin you da 4-1-1 in case of a 9-1-1. And lastly but not least, da Chicken's name is Fred! Tanks fer flyin da Tranny!


AWWWWWW YEEEAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

Yo, dat be funnie.

 

[airspeedsalive]

Yo, dat be funnie.

Dat dute's da schizznit!