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Dating Service
- Thread starter ThomasR
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dondk
Don't you wish
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ThomasR
Eye of the Storm
- Joined
- Feb 20, 2004
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Dating Services
Thanks much,
I am in a difficult social position at the moment. I am in the market for most everything considered essential for human happiness. You all gave me a pretty good understanding of what to expect on the open dating market and delivered it with a wide array of wit and sincerity.
1. I got some places to visit to alleviate frustration
2. some places to visit to get frusratation
3. places to avoid getting frustration
4. a scary review of blind dating
5. a very good explanation of a males "biological clock" in regard to female availability and expectations
6. perspective from both genders
7. and some stories of happy ending that keep my hopes alive.
Aviation has some of the best individuals on earth.
Thanks much,
I am in a difficult social position at the moment. I am in the market for most everything considered essential for human happiness. You all gave me a pretty good understanding of what to expect on the open dating market and delivered it with a wide array of wit and sincerity.
1. I got some places to visit to alleviate frustration
2. some places to visit to get frusratation
3. places to avoid getting frustration
4. a scary review of blind dating
5. a very good explanation of a males "biological clock" in regard to female availability and expectations
6. perspective from both genders
7. and some stories of happy ending that keep my hopes alive.
Aviation has some of the best individuals on earth.
Ravengirl
Sierra Whiskey!
- Joined
- Nov 25, 2001
- Posts
- 211
I'll chime in here on the internet vs. coffee shop debate.
I met a man on the internet, at Match.com, actually. The relationship was short-lived and tumultuous. Conversations were always awkward and "intimate encounters" were even worse. He did look like his picture, incidentally...but he was also a drug addicted convicted felon.
Yeah, that wasn't so great. Most people I know haven't had much better luck. However, I met the man I'm going to marry next year at the coffee shop I've been hanging out at for years...while I was dating someone else. So we actually got to talk and know each other first...and it's fantastic. I'll take real life over the internet any day.
I met a man on the internet, at Match.com, actually. The relationship was short-lived and tumultuous. Conversations were always awkward and "intimate encounters" were even worse. He did look like his picture, incidentally...but he was also a drug addicted convicted felon.
Yeah, that wasn't so great. Most people I know haven't had much better luck. However, I met the man I'm going to marry next year at the coffee shop I've been hanging out at for years...while I was dating someone else. So we actually got to talk and know each other first...and it's fantastic. I'll take real life over the internet any day.
ThomasR
Eye of the Storm
- Joined
- Feb 20, 2004
- Posts
- 324
Dating Services
Ravengirl,
Was that happy encounter one of an unexpected kind. I have heard that such occasions can not be planned. The harder one looks the more distant becomes the goal until, by chance, the right one appears unexpectedly.
Is there a pattern in life or is all just chance? Dr. Phil suggests making whatever you get, good or bad, workout regardless of ones comfort level in the relationship.
I have met women you couldn't pry me away from them with a crowbar but I couldn't get close to them. Then there were those I couldn't get far enough away from but found them around me all the time.
I can go along with pretty much either philosophy. If it is possible to plan a relationship, I know to specific detail the kind of person I am attracted to . In that case it is a simply knowing where to look in finding this kind of person. If it is not possible to plan, I guess it doesn't matter what I like.
Ravengirl,
Was that happy encounter one of an unexpected kind. I have heard that such occasions can not be planned. The harder one looks the more distant becomes the goal until, by chance, the right one appears unexpectedly.
Is there a pattern in life or is all just chance? Dr. Phil suggests making whatever you get, good or bad, workout regardless of ones comfort level in the relationship.
I have met women you couldn't pry me away from them with a crowbar but I couldn't get close to them. Then there were those I couldn't get far enough away from but found them around me all the time.
I can go along with pretty much either philosophy. If it is possible to plan a relationship, I know to specific detail the kind of person I am attracted to . In that case it is a simply knowing where to look in finding this kind of person. If it is not possible to plan, I guess it doesn't matter what I like.
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Ravengirl
Sierra Whiskey!
- Joined
- Nov 25, 2001
- Posts
- 211
I don't believe that anything that happens in this life is an accident (that's about the ONLY concrete belief I have at this point in my life.)
I would say that the entire encounter was unexpected. My current fiance is someone I met and became friends with while I was planning to marry someone else...and when that someone else and I parted ways, I did not expect, not for a second, to develop a relationship with my fiance. There are many reasons I didn't see it coming, and when I realized it was, I initially tried to fight it (clearly, I wasn't terribly successful.) It happened anyway...and two years later we're planning a wedding. Strange. The time in my life I was really hurting and not looking for anyone, and I found the man I want to marry.
I believe that there is a reason for everything that happens, even if the reasons are not our own or are unclear (if this makes any sense, it's late and I'm tired.) That said, there are all sorts of places to meet people...and you can meet any type of person anywhere, these days. Though I don't think I'd seek out a potential mate at, say, a strip club or a dive bar. But that's not saying I couldn't meet the right person there- I'd just be surprised if I did. But this kind of thing is really not something you can look for, in my opinion...there are ways to be wise and improve your chances, but sometimes you just have to step back and let things come to you.
I am constantly surprised by my life and what it hands me, just when I think I have it figured out.
the exhausted philospher...Stephanie
I would say that the entire encounter was unexpected. My current fiance is someone I met and became friends with while I was planning to marry someone else...and when that someone else and I parted ways, I did not expect, not for a second, to develop a relationship with my fiance. There are many reasons I didn't see it coming, and when I realized it was, I initially tried to fight it (clearly, I wasn't terribly successful.) It happened anyway...and two years later we're planning a wedding. Strange. The time in my life I was really hurting and not looking for anyone, and I found the man I want to marry.
I believe that there is a reason for everything that happens, even if the reasons are not our own or are unclear (if this makes any sense, it's late and I'm tired.) That said, there are all sorts of places to meet people...and you can meet any type of person anywhere, these days. Though I don't think I'd seek out a potential mate at, say, a strip club or a dive bar. But that's not saying I couldn't meet the right person there- I'd just be surprised if I did. But this kind of thing is really not something you can look for, in my opinion...there are ways to be wise and improve your chances, but sometimes you just have to step back and let things come to you.
I am constantly surprised by my life and what it hands me, just when I think I have it figured out.
the exhausted philospher...Stephanie
I've long resigned to the fact that theres no reason for anything
causality, and randomness, thats the true "nature" of life for lack of a better descriptor
the inherent problem with philosophy, as nietzsche put it, is its relation to perspective (in other words, the ideology is defended after the fact with reason to support the persons internal belief)
thats why so many philisophical debates end in stalemates.
from ravengirls (and many others i'm sure) perspective, life is a structured (albeit surreptitious) sequence of events (fate, if you will) from which they try to draw some kind of meaning.
while others perspectives, like myself, is that life is an interconnected series of unrelated events (at best some are causally tied together) having no intrinsic meaning other than what we make of it (how we affect our world and those around us, not as in finding a "meaning" in it).
everything, and at the same time, nothing, surprises me in life
this isn't meant as a jab at anyone or anything, just stating some things to think about.
causality, and randomness, thats the true "nature" of life for lack of a better descriptor
the inherent problem with philosophy, as nietzsche put it, is its relation to perspective (in other words, the ideology is defended after the fact with reason to support the persons internal belief)
thats why so many philisophical debates end in stalemates.
from ravengirls (and many others i'm sure) perspective, life is a structured (albeit surreptitious) sequence of events (fate, if you will) from which they try to draw some kind of meaning.
while others perspectives, like myself, is that life is an interconnected series of unrelated events (at best some are causally tied together) having no intrinsic meaning other than what we make of it (how we affect our world and those around us, not as in finding a "meaning" in it).
everything, and at the same time, nothing, surprises me in life
this isn't meant as a jab at anyone or anything, just stating some things to think about.
ruminations
some more thoughts i've had on the dating topic...
being in this industry makes the possibility of meeting anyone exceedingly more difficult, from the lack of social time, to the problems with trying to start and maintain a relationship in little, infrequent, spurts (no pun intended
) so i guess that just double dams us poor saps in the airlines that are single.....
not to mention trying to explain the bizarro-ness of living life as an 121 pilot, schedules, reserve, time off, etc.... thought the online thing might be easier for this instance, but it wasn't, at least for me, but then....i'm just a freak
some more thoughts i've had on the dating topic...
being in this industry makes the possibility of meeting anyone exceedingly more difficult, from the lack of social time, to the problems with trying to start and maintain a relationship in little, infrequent, spurts (no pun intended
) so i guess that just double dams us poor saps in the airlines that are single.....not to mention trying to explain the bizarro-ness of living life as an 121 pilot, schedules, reserve, time off, etc.... thought the online thing might be easier for this instance, but it wasn't, at least for me, but then....i'm just a freak
Hi all,
A little more advice...do not ever date anyone from work, especially from a small crew base.
You may be gods gift to women or men, but if your relationship goes sour, for whatever reason, you will think the lightspeed barrier has been broken with how fast the news travels.
The whole airline will know your life story and personal information with probably a not-too-great spin on it.
If you wan't to date within the industry, do it with someone from ANOTHER airline. Besides, if it works out, you double your travel benefits.
Best,
Nu
A little more advice...do not ever date anyone from work, especially from a small crew base.
You may be gods gift to women or men, but if your relationship goes sour, for whatever reason, you will think the lightspeed barrier has been broken with how fast the news travels.
The whole airline will know your life story and personal information with probably a not-too-great spin on it.
If you wan't to date within the industry, do it with someone from ANOTHER airline. Besides, if it works out, you double your travel benefits.
Best,
Nu
3
350DRIVER
www.love-is-in-the-air.com
The responses have been many and you are able to be extremely selective. Never thought AC was any good until I went here. The key is picture..
I can't even compare the other sites to this one... I do not think one could be dissapointed. PM me and I will send you some "responses".
3 5 0
The responses have been many and you are able to be extremely selective. Never thought AC was any good until I went here. The key is picture..
I can't even compare the other sites to this one... I do not think one could be dissapointed. PM me and I will send you some "responses".
3 5 0
uhm....didn't seem that great to me...
dude, i did a generic search and on that site in all of the us, theres only 13 women between 20-30 with no kids, using basic physical numbers of 4'11"-6' and 80#-180# which are pretty broad ranges for only 13 results...maybe i'm configuring the search wrong (which btw is a pretty bad setup for searching, no state selection, or radii for zips), i dunno...
dude, i did a generic search and on that site in all of the us, theres only 13 women between 20-30 with no kids, using basic physical numbers of 4'11"-6' and 80#-180# which are pretty broad ranges for only 13 results...maybe i'm configuring the search wrong (which btw is a pretty bad setup for searching, no state selection, or radii for zips), i dunno...
350DRIVER said:
ThomasR
Eye of the Storm
- Joined
- Feb 20, 2004
- Posts
- 324
NuGuy said:
NuGuy,
Sounds like you have had personal experience in this area. Did you try to keep your interests confidential or did you open it to general knowledge?
Some companies frown on inner office dating. Others prefer discretion warning against conflicts detracting from productivity.
What do you feel is the down side to company gossip regarding in-house dating?
Large Corporations:
Entertainment Industry:
Military:
AirLines:
3
350DRIVER
Dash8,
I tried to copy and paste the links of those pictures/profiles to this board but for some reason that site is set up in a way that it will not allow me to do that. Just type in male searching for female, leave all other fields blank and these all will then come up. I think they are on or around page 3 or 4. I think you may enjoy.
3 5 0
I tried to copy and paste the links of those pictures/profiles to this board but for some reason that site is set up in a way that it will not allow me to do that. Just type in male searching for female, leave all other fields blank and these all will then come up. I think they are on or around page 3 or 4. I think you may enjoy.
3 5 0
Snakum
How's your marmott?
- Joined
- Feb 21, 2002
- Posts
- 2,090
I dunno where you guys are getting your info on over-36 women, but lemme clue ya in, brothers ....
I turned 40 this year and after a marriage or three and more live-in, long-term relationships than I care to recount, I decided to join Match.com and just be totally up front because I was dating a lot, but no one really 'stuck out' in any meaningful way. They were all nice ladies, and still great friends, but no one I'd take home to meet my kids except as a friend. On Match I said that I was educated and had a career, but was not rich, that I was not a 'player' nor a bad-boy, but had a past, blah, blah, blah. I also included a couple recent pictures. The seven women I met and dated (two for a while [Edit:removed 'now' haven't dated but one person since March]) reflected my general experience with women over the last few years as I've gotten older:
1) There are still PLENTY of gold-diggers out there my age
2) Many women STILL don't have a clue what they want at 40
3) Many women have a VERY skewed idea of what 'curvy' means
4) ALL women think ALL men are a work-in-process and can be changed, despite his age
Sorry to disappoint.
I've always dug older women, and I still do, but in the last few years I have dated a 21-year-old all the way to a 52-year-old (who was freaking STUNNING ) and I am open to different races, etc. I too figured that a woman in her 40s ought to be independant, realistic about life, and generally squared away by then. Not always so ...
Minh
EDIT ... I'm newly single today as of an hour ago and now I REALLY stand by Numbers 2 and 4. I can't $%&*ing win.
I turned 40 this year and after a marriage or three and more live-in, long-term relationships than I care to recount, I decided to join Match.com and just be totally up front because I was dating a lot, but no one really 'stuck out' in any meaningful way. They were all nice ladies, and still great friends, but no one I'd take home to meet my kids except as a friend. On Match I said that I was educated and had a career, but was not rich, that I was not a 'player' nor a bad-boy, but had a past, blah, blah, blah. I also included a couple recent pictures. The seven women I met and dated (two for a while [Edit:removed 'now' haven't dated but one person since March]) reflected my general experience with women over the last few years as I've gotten older:
1) There are still PLENTY of gold-diggers out there my age
2) Many women STILL don't have a clue what they want at 40
3) Many women have a VERY skewed idea of what 'curvy' means
4) ALL women think ALL men are a work-in-process and can be changed, despite his age
Sorry to disappoint.
I've always dug older women, and I still do, but in the last few years I have dated a 21-year-old all the way to a 52-year-old (who was freaking STUNNING
) and I am open to different races, etc. I too figured that a woman in her 40s ought to be independant, realistic about life, and generally squared away by then. Not always so ... Minh
EDIT ... I'm newly single today as of an hour ago and now I REALLY stand by Numbers 2 and 4.
I can't $%&*ing win.
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ThomasR
Eye of the Storm
- Joined
- Feb 20, 2004
- Posts
- 324
Dear Kathy[ResumeWriter] and Stephanie[ravengirl],
It happened again. I need a woman's perspective. The woman of my dreams walked into the library [I spend afternoons in a public library and evening in a medical library]. I looked up to see someone I have never seen before except in my day dreams; 5'10", light brown hair, hazel eyes, dressed in black and white solids, casual slacks and blouse, thin with a coordinated awkwardness about her, very long legs and a pixie hair cut [which is a bit short for me but I was willing to compromise when everything else was so right].
I saw her and I froze. My eyes got so wide I do believe they were bugging out slightly. She must have known I was attracted to her by the way I jerked to good posture and leaned immediately to her attention. But, I could not think of what to say. It was all so sudden.
This always happens. If I wasn't attracted I could chatter on like a monkey. But when I see someone I like my mind goes blank. What is wrong with me and what would you do if you were this 9.99 out of 10. Of course I know absolutely nothing about her and now I might never see her again [as usual].
She went about her business on the computer and left. I tried to follow her for a short distance hoping for an opportunity to exchange pleasantries that would create time for a more solid foot hold. But the opportunity never developed.
I know there is no picture of me onLine to formulate an opinion. But I have observed that everyone in aviation is well above an 8 on a 10 scale. That leaves any solid attraction to intrinsic values that can be obtain only by personal interaction or through a personal profile. All of which takes a certain amount of time to collect.
Does this happen to all men? And why do women not initiate contact? Do you have any "stop and pay attention" openers that you feel comfortable with?
It happened again. I need a woman's perspective. The woman of my dreams walked into the library [I spend afternoons in a public library and evening in a medical library]. I looked up to see someone I have never seen before except in my day dreams; 5'10", light brown hair, hazel eyes, dressed in black and white solids, casual slacks and blouse, thin with a coordinated awkwardness about her, very long legs and a pixie hair cut [which is a bit short for me but I was willing to compromise when everything else was so right].
I saw her and I froze. My eyes got so wide I do believe they were bugging out slightly. She must have known I was attracted to her by the way I jerked to good posture and leaned immediately to her attention. But, I could not think of what to say. It was all so sudden.
This always happens. If I wasn't attracted I could chatter on like a monkey. But when I see someone I like my mind goes blank. What is wrong with me and what would you do if you were this 9.99 out of 10. Of course I know absolutely nothing about her and now I might never see her again [as usual].
She went about her business on the computer and left. I tried to follow her for a short distance hoping for an opportunity to exchange pleasantries that would create time for a more solid foot hold. But the opportunity never developed.
I know there is no picture of me onLine to formulate an opinion. But I have observed that everyone in aviation is well above an 8 on a 10 scale. That leaves any solid attraction to intrinsic values that can be obtain only by personal interaction or through a personal profile. All of which takes a certain amount of time to collect.
Does this happen to all men? And why do women not initiate contact? Do you have any "stop and pay attention" openers that you feel comfortable with?
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ThomasR said:Dear Kathy[ResumeWriter] and Stephanie[ravengirl],
*snipped*
She went about her business on the computer and left. I tried to follow her for a short distance hoping for an opportunity to exchange pleasantries that would create time for a more solid foot hold. But the opportunity never developed.
I know there is no picture of me onLine to formulate an opinion. But I have observed that everyone in aviation is well above an 8 on a 10 scale. That leaves any solid attraction to intrinsic values that can be obtain only by personal interaction or through a personal profile. All of which takes a certain amount of time to collect.
Does this happen to all men? And why do women not initiate contact? Do you have any "stop and pay attention" openers that you feel comfortable with?
Same thing happens to me, can't just converse with new females in a semi social setting
dunno where you work, but everyone in aviation is an 8 or higher??
you've never seen me or some of the people i work with, lol
Snakum said:
ok, i'll ask it,
ladies;
aileron, cubegirl, nik, resume, raven, aviatrix, and any others who's names i couldn't think of....
why is item 4 in minhs list true? what is it about women that they just can't leave well enough alone? i've often wondered about that, as i'm sure most of them other men here have done, any thoughts?
ThomasR
Eye of the Storm
- Joined
- Feb 20, 2004
- Posts
- 324
I don't know what lol or j/k is but I do know what stalker is and it's not stalking just because you are traveling in the same direction. [meat head] I do have a story about that though, I was dating a nurse........ I'll tell you about it when the topic turns to uncontrolable behavior.
You are right I have never seen you or your company staff, How bad can you look? You can't answer that either. You have to have someone else who has seen you answer.
Corporate clients don't want to have gargoyles at the controls.
they're standard net acronyms
lol = laugh out loud
j/k = just kidding
well if your in a frac/corporate outfit then they can afford to be pickier about appearances than the airlines, who with their 'deep pockets' would be easy targets for someone looking for a frivoulous lawsuit about only hiring 'the pretty people'
as for myself, eh, i could be better, but i don't think i'm a troll or anything like that
lol = laugh out loud
j/k = just kidding
well if your in a frac/corporate outfit then they can afford to be pickier about appearances than the airlines, who with their 'deep pockets' would be easy targets for someone looking for a frivoulous lawsuit about only hiring 'the pretty people'
as for myself, eh, i could be better, but i don't think i'm a troll or anything like that
ThomasR said:I don't know what lol or j/k is but I do know what stalker is and it's not stalking just because you are traveling in the same direction. [meat head] I do have a story about that though, I was dating a nurse........ I'll tell you about it when the topic turns to uncontrolable behavior.
You are right I have never seen you or your company staff, How bad can you look? You can't answer that either. You have to have someone else who has seen you answer.
Corporate clients don't want to have gargoyles at the controls.
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ThomasR
Eye of the Storm
- Joined
- Feb 20, 2004
- Posts
- 324
Dash8,
Thanks, I didn't know about acronyms.
There use to be a lot of complaints about "pretty people" getting all the modeling contracts, high end sales positions and public relations. There were "show horses" and "work horses." Much of that has changed but pretty people still need a place to work and many of them show up in aviation.
It is not necessarily a compliment needing to be rectified by a lawsuit. It is an observation coming from the eye of the beholder.
And I am not sure I should trust your esthetic judgements concerning your own biographic imagery.
Snakum
How's your marmott?
- Joined
- Feb 21, 2002
- Posts
- 2,090
Try this ...
Walk by slowly while reading a non-descript printout, and softly say "God, I can't believe how much I've been paying in taxes since I hit six figures per year." and look at her with a slightly vulnerable smile.
Or try this ...
Stomp forcefully up to her while she's reading, pull the book from her hand and loudly say "Yo b!tch! How 'bouts a hummer?"
Or you could just tell her you're a pilot. I hear chicks really dig pilots. Well ... that's what I heard.
Lemme know how it works for ya.
Minh "Cassanova" Thong
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