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Cactus 1594 CVR Transcript

erj-145mech

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 13, 2002
Posts
1,071
Total Time
1350
Transcript of Cockpit Voice Recorder of the Hudson River Crash



Cockpit Voice Recorder

Here is the transcript from the voice recorder from the Hudson River Crash

PIC is a Pilot in Command, SIC is Second in Command, you all know who Sully is

SIC: "Number two's gone, boss."

Sully: "I know it! What do I look like, an R-22
pilot (that's a baby helicopter a real egg
beater)? Just shut the f*cker down, boy. Oh,
and tell Departure that we need to come back in and land. F*cking birds..."

SIC: "Sheesh, somebody got up on the wrong side
of his throne this morning. You don't have to
insult me just because I got my commercial
helicopter rating in the mighty Robinson. Oh,
and by the way, sir, we're not climbing, if you
even care. Maybe your decision to take on that
extra 5,000 pounds of fuel wasn't so hot, Captain."

Sully: "One more comment like that and I'll make
sure the union keeps you in RJ's for the rest of your miserable, short career."

<Bang!>

Sully: "SON OF A BITCH!"

SIC: "Number one's failing, boss."

Sully: "I can see that! Am I
a-f*cking-sleep? Can I not read the gauges? Am I not flying the plane here?"

SIC: "I'm just sayin'..."

Sully: "******* Canadians, sending their f*cking
geese down here every winter. Why, if I ever
*see* another Canadian I'm gonna punch him right
in the throat. I *HATE* Canadians."

SIC: "Everybody does, boss. Think we can make
Teterboro or straight-in to 22 at Newark?"

Sully: "Yeah, probably. But f*ck
Teterboro! Let's go to Newark. I've flown out
of Teterboro. Short **** runways...always a
crosswind. And their FBO's suck. I'd rather
land in the Hudson f*cking river than land at Teterboro. Hey...."

SIC: "You're not..."

Sully: "Why not? Maybe we can take out some
sailboats with some prick Canadian snowbirds."

SIC: "You ever land on the water before?"

Sully: "Plenty of times! I got my seaplane
rating back in 1946. I think it was in
a...Piper...somethingoranother, I forget. Never
mind. It'll all come back to me. Pull out the
Before Water Landing checklist and run it."

SIC: (flipping through the stack of checklists)
"Can't seem to find one for that."

Sully: "Fooled ya! HAH! There ain't one! Just
get on the horn and tell the people to put their
heads between their legs and kiss...no wait, that
won't sound good on on the CVR tape...make it,
'brace for collision'...no wait, make it 'brace
for impact.' Yeah, that's better. No
wait! Tell them that out the left side of the
plane they can see the Intrepid Museum, and that
if they'd like to visit it, they'll be able to,
this afternoon, like, in about twenty
minutes. Oh, and ring the stews and have them
bring me a rum and coke. If I'm gonna do this, I
need a good stiff drink. And have that one with
the big tits bring it up. If I'm gonna die, I
wanna die drunk and with a boner."

SIC: "Like your grandfather did?"

Sully: "This is no time to make jokes, son. I
would really appreciate it if you'd try to take
this situation seriously. I'm fairly certain
that my grandfather did not die with a boner. I
mean, have you ever met my grandmother?"

SIC: "You know, if you pull this off CNN will be
calling you the Hero Pilot of the Year."

Sully: "F*ck CNN. Liberal bastards. All I care
about is what the fair-and-balanced Fox News will
call me. I hope Fox News calls me a hero!"

SIC: (sighing) "They probably will too. Nobody
will remember *my* name. It'll be 'Sully
this'...and, 'Sully that.' 'Captain Sully, the
big f*cking hero.' Like you are the only f*cking one in the cockpit."

Sully: "You're quite bitter. You really are a
helicopter pilot at heart, aren't you? You know,
some pilots wait their whole career to be called
a hero. I mean, Christ, I've only got two years
to go to retirement. That was close!"

SIC: "We're not down yet, Captain Skygod."

Sully: "I know, this thing glides pretty well,
huh? Dammit, no sailboats. Oh well, let's see
if we can buzz one of those **** sightseeing
helicopters. What's best-glide/engines out?"

SIC: "Beats the **** outta me."

Sully: "Vref?"

SIC: "F*ck if I know."

Sully: "Britney Spears' birthday?"

SIC: "December 2, 1981."

Sully: "Well, I'm glad you know SOMETHING! Just gimme full flaps..."

[END OF RECORDING]
 

SoCentralRain

Hüsker Dü you remember?
Joined
Feb 1, 2002
Posts
217
Total Time
>10000
That's 1 minute of my life I want back.
 

Captzaahlie

My kind of FOD!
Joined
Dec 29, 2004
Posts
1,564
Total Time
18k ?
I kinda liked it, but I'm weird that way.....

I'll read your first book ERJ as long as the pictures are good of the FA with the big rack......:beer:
 

Going2Baja

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 2, 2005
Posts
1,258
Total Time
10k+
ERJ-145 - You Sir are a complete tool. For your sake I hope the Karma Train has already passed you, if not, LOOK OUT!!

Not funny in the least.

Baja.
 

Super Monkey

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 5, 2005
Posts
63
Total Time
7000+
I actually thought it was kinda funny...

....too soon???
 

vtwo

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 18, 2005
Posts
329
Total Time
+11K
I thought it was great!!!!!!!

Relax you uptight whiner's No one killed or even really hurt that bad. if you can't laugh then go and shoot your miserable self in the head for our sake.

Keep em coming, I need that today in the shl7 hole i am at.

v2
 

erj-145mech

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 13, 2002
Posts
1,071
Total Time
1350
ERJ-145 - You Sir are a complete tool. For your sake I hope the Karma Train has already passed you, if not, LOOK OUT!!

Not funny in the least.

Baja.

Then you Sir, are cordially invited to take your Sierra back to Baja, and see if you can find your sense of humor.
 

contrail67

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 13, 2003
Posts
954
Total Time
15,000
Transcript of Cockpit Voice Recorder of the Hudson River Crash



Cockpit Voice Recorder

Here is the transcript from the voice recorder from the Hudson River Crash

PIC is a Pilot in Command, SIC is Second in Command, you all know who Sully is

SIC: "Number two's gone, boss."

Sully: "I know it! What do I look like, an R-22
pilot (that's a baby helicopter a real egg
beater)? Just shut the f*cker down, boy. Oh,
and tell Departure that we need to come back in and land. F*cking birds..."

SIC: "Sheesh, somebody got up on the wrong side
of his throne this morning. You don't have to
insult me just because I got my commercial
helicopter rating in the mighty Robinson. Oh,
and by the way, sir, we're not climbing, if you
even care. Maybe your decision to take on that
extra 5,000 pounds of fuel wasn't so hot, Captain."

Sully: "One more comment like that and I'll make
sure the union keeps you in RJ's for the rest of your miserable, short career."

<Bang!>

Sully: "SON OF A BITCH!"

SIC: "Number one's failing, boss."

Sully: "I can see that! Am I
a-f*cking-sleep? Can I not read the gauges? Am I not flying the plane here?"

SIC: "I'm just sayin'..."

Sully: "******* Canadians, sending their f*cking
geese down here every winter. Why, if I ever
*see* another Canadian I'm gonna punch him right
in the throat. I *HATE* Canadians."

SIC: "Everybody does, boss. Think we can make
Teterboro or straight-in to 22 at Newark?"

Sully: "Yeah, probably. But f*ck
Teterboro! Let's go to Newark. I've flown out
of Teterboro. Short **** runways...always a
crosswind. And their FBO's suck. I'd rather
land in the Hudson f*cking river than land at Teterboro. Hey...."

SIC: "You're not..."

Sully: "Why not? Maybe we can take out some
sailboats with some prick Canadian snowbirds."

SIC: "You ever land on the water before?"

Sully: "Plenty of times! I got my seaplane
rating back in 1946. I think it was in
a...Piper...somethingoranother, I forget. Never
mind. It'll all come back to me. Pull out the
Before Water Landing checklist and run it."

SIC: (flipping through the stack of checklists)
"Can't seem to find one for that."

Sully: "Fooled ya! HAH! There ain't one! Just
get on the horn and tell the people to put their
heads between their legs and kiss...no wait, that
won't sound good on on the CVR tape...make it,
'brace for collision'...no wait, make it 'brace
for impact.' Yeah, that's better. No
wait! Tell them that out the left side of the
plane they can see the Intrepid Museum, and that
if they'd like to visit it, they'll be able to,
this afternoon, like, in about twenty
minutes. Oh, and ring the stews and have them
bring me a rum and coke. If I'm gonna do this, I
need a good stiff drink. And have that one with
the big tits bring it up. If I'm gonna die, I
wanna die drunk and with a boner."

SIC: "Like your grandfather did?"

Sully: "This is no time to make jokes, son. I
would really appreciate it if you'd try to take
this situation seriously. I'm fairly certain
that my grandfather did not die with a boner. I
mean, have you ever met my grandmother?"

SIC: "You know, if you pull this off CNN will be
calling you the Hero Pilot of the Year."

Sully: "F*ck CNN. Liberal bastards. All I care
about is what the fair-and-balanced Fox News will
call me. I hope Fox News calls me a hero!"

SIC: (sighing) "They probably will too. Nobody
will remember *my* name. It'll be 'Sully
this'...and, 'Sully that.' 'Captain Sully, the
big f*cking hero.' Like you are the only f*cking one in the cockpit."

Sully: "You're quite bitter. You really are a
helicopter pilot at heart, aren't you? You know,
some pilots wait their whole career to be called
a hero. I mean, Christ, I've only got two years
to go to retirement. That was close!"

SIC: "We're not down yet, Captain Skygod."

Sully: "I know, this thing glides pretty well,
huh? Dammit, no sailboats. Oh well, let's see
if we can buzz one of those **** sightseeing
helicopters. What's best-glide/engines out?"

SIC: "Beats the **** outta me."

Sully: "Vref?"

SIC: "F*ck if I know."

Sully: "Britney Spears' birthday?"

SIC: "December 2, 1981."

Sully: "Well, I'm glad you know SOMETHING! Just gimme full flaps..."

[END OF RECORDING]

Go away.
 

aewanabe

Somewhat Exasperated User
Joined
Nov 26, 2001
Posts
556
Total Time
8200
I may be a bit twisted, but this made me chuckle...
 

b707guy

Analog Kid
Joined
Feb 5, 2007
Posts
520
Total Time
9k-ish
If erj was in reality Jeff Skiles, this would be hilarious. I got a kick out of it. Shoulda invaded Canada (successfully for you history buffs...) a long time ago!:nuts:
 

Captzaahlie

My kind of FOD!
Joined
Dec 29, 2004
Posts
1,564
Total Time
18k ?
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