Bed bugs followed me home!

[SuperFLUF]

probably strengthen's your immune system

The first thing I do when I get in the room is make myself all necked, wrap myself in the comforter, make a bath and oh, lick the remote control. Is that wrong?

Not at all. Its just in the wrong order.

First you lick the remote.....

Don't forget to make some coffee using the toilet water.

Carlin's observation on germs: (caution extreme language) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Y-yH_Qyipc
OK, his language is extreme, but you gotta admit he's got a point. Society is trending towards germaphobia. Or a Carlin would say, a bunch of *%&^& pansies!