Artcile on USAPA's protests

Joey Bagodonutz

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Carolina Panthers to protest Play-off result.

API – January 11, 2009: 0957AM

If the Arizona Cardinals think that they will play in the NFC Championship game, they might want to think again. On Monday, the Carolina Panthers will officially protest the final score of last night’s game in which Arizona beat Carolina 33-13.

“Obviously, the final result of the game is just a starting point for discussion” according to Brad Ford, a third string punter with the Panthers and the president of the fledgling Unified Sorry-A$$ Panthers Association which was formed in the back of the team bus yesterday. “Let’s look at the facts…..we had a better regular season record, we were the home team and most of the bookies expected us to win the match. The Panthers even went to the Super Bowl a few years back while the Cardinals haven’t won a playoff game in years. The fact that we were going to the Super Bowl this year was set in stone. I don’t even know why the NFL insisted on us playing the game. It should have just been given to us. And then the Cardinals have the gall to show up prepared and play hard. We didn’t expect that. If Arizona only had any sense of decency, they would have rolled over and let us win in front of our home crowd. They shattered my career expectation which had me getting a Super Bowl ring this season. This is just not the way we do things in Charlotte”.

Appearing with punter Brad Ford was the Association’s lawyer, Leah Seeum from the NY lawfirm of Pleez, Hunny, Lemme & Seeum. “My clients have a watertight case” Ms. Seeum stated. “Game results are like Happy Meals. Fully negotiable, especially in regard to which toy you get with it. We are going to take this all the way up to the Commissioner. Not only should have Arizona voluntarily forfeited the game but the way the referees handled the game was completely biased. They are just 7 senile old men in TGI Friday shirts!”

Before leaving the stadium, Ms. Seeum had a warning for the NFL Commissioner: “He better change the results of the match as well as the archaic and biased scoring system and play-off schedule if he wants to keep an NFL team in Charlotte. We already spoke to the NHL and will join that league if the NFL refuses to bow to our demands. Of course, the Carolina Hurricanes are already playing in the NHL, but our organization is senior to them. Therefore, they will be joining the development league of the NBA for now. They will be able to bid back into the NHL or move to the NBA after 5 seasons, based on some conditions and restrictions we are currently writing”.

Representatives of the NFL, Cardinals, NHL and the Hurricanes could not be reached for comment.
 

LanceAir

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Only 28 posts and we get that gem? You should post more often.
 

m80drvr

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Now thats one of the best posts I've ever seen on Flight info.

Sad it's so true though

Nice work
 

m80drvr

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No comment from the angry FO club I guess
 

Flybywire44

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So US Air is reducing capacity... How much is coming out of the easta nd the west?
 

Raoul Duke

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The only problem with that post is that it compares USAPA to professionals and based on what I have seen of USAPA they are everything but professional.
 

CatfishVT9

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Clearly you forgot to mention that the referees were negligent for not instituting "point redistributiion" to make it a more fair contest. Oklahoma University officials are considering a similar appeal.
 

Captzaahlie

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Carolina Panthers to protest Play-off result.

API – January 11, 2009: 0957AM


Representatives of the NFL, Cardinals, NHL and the Hurricanes could not be reached for comment.

Nicely done Oh bag a nuts!

:beer:
 
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