You might work in aircraft maintenance If...

[Gatorman]

I think that I hit on about 30 of these....how about you?


1. You've ever slept on the concrete under a wing
2. You've ever said, "Oh yes sir, it's supposed to look like that."
3. You've ever sucked OXY to cure a hangover.
4. You know what JP4/JP8 tastes like.
5. You've ever used a grease pencil to fix an overworn tire.
6. You have a better benchstock in the pockets of your coveralls than the supply system.
7. You've ever used a piece of safety wire as a toothpick.
8. You've ever had to say, "My boots are still black!" (or ever spray-painted them black)
9. You refer to a pilot as a "stick actuator."
10. You've ever been told to go get "some prop wash and a yard of flightline."
11. You've ever worked a 14 hour shift on a aircraft that isn't flying the next day.
12. You've ever said "as long as she starts every other try you'll be fine sir."
13. You believe the aircraft has a soul.
14. You talk to the aircraft.
15. You've ever said, "That nav light burned out after launch."
16. You've ever used a wheel chock as a hammer.
17. The only thing you know about any city is where the good bars are.
18. You know more about your co-workers than you do about your own family.
19. You've ever looked for pictures of "your" aircraft in aviation books.
20. You can't figure out why maintenance officers exist.
21. You ever wished the pilot would just say, "Great aircraft!"
22. You take it as a badge of honor to be just called "a Det Hound."
23. You relieve yourself more often outdoors than indoors.
24. You can't comprehend why everyone doesn't want to be a Maintainer.
25. You think everyone who isn't a Maintainer is a wimp....
26. You can sleep anywhere, anytime, but as soon as the engines shut down you are wide awake.
27. You've ever stood on wheel chocks to keep your feet dry.
28. Used dykes to trim a fingernail.
29. Wiped leaks immediately prior to crew show.
30. Worn someone else's hat to chow.
31. All you care about is the flying schedule and your days off.
32. Wondered where they keep finding the idiots that keep making up stupid rules.
33. You've ever had to defuel an aircraft an hour after refueling it.
34. You've ever wondered why it takes a college degree to break an airplane but only a high school diploma to fix one.

 

[Weasel Keeper]

These were written for military, but most hold true with A&Ps too.

I've done most but I never wore anyone else's hat to chow. BTW, what's chow? :laugh: We were lucky if we got chow. Dang F-4s were always broke.

 

[sbn340mech]

Anyone who has ever fixed a fuel leak in the wing tank of a B1900 is very familiar with line 33. :angryfire

 

[RafaelThielmann]

only 18, but i'm only a few monts at the job, so you must forgive me...
and... have never slept on the concrete under the wing, but do it on first-class seats and on the MLG doors (when they're open of course)...

 

[Gatorman]

only 18, but i'm only a few monts at the job, so you must forgive me...
and... have never slept on the concrete under the wing, but do it on first-class seats and on the MLG doors (when they're open of course)...

Let me tell you something there skippy....

When you are able to check off at least half of those, then you might have something to say on a thread that I post. Most of us have more time bending wrenches on somebody else's chunk of poo than you have making a mess in your own pampers.
I am sorry kid, maybe in Brazil you might be making you daddy proud, but most of us would not want our kids anywhere close to an airport.

You want to be somebody? Don't be an aircraft mechanic!
My avatar is probably the only, most known, aircraft mechanic since the Wright brothers.
You want to make some money any have the possibility of becoming someone...get a degree as an engineer.



...otherwise, good luck.

 

[Weasel Keeper]

19. You've ever looked for pictures of "your" aircraft in aviation books.

F-4G 69-7207. "MY" lady in the late 80s. When she was mine she had a big WW on the tail for the 561TFS though.

http://www.airliners.net/open.file?id=0140065&size=L&width=1024&height=695&sok=JURER%20%20%28ZNGPU%20%28nvepensg%2Cnveyvar%2Ccynpr%2Ccubgb_qngr%2Cpbhagel%2Cerznex%2Ccubgbtencure%2Crznvy%2Clrne%2Cert%2Cnvepensg_trarevp%2Cpa%2Cpbqr%29%20NTNVAFG%20%28%27%2B%2269-207%22%27%20VA%20OBBYRNA%20ZBQR%29%29%20%20beqre%20ol%20cubgb_vq%20QRFP&photo_nr=1&prev_id=&next_id=NEXTID

 

[sbn340mech]

Ah yes, an engineer, hated by mechanics everywhere!!!

 

[pw4000]

Quote:
Originally Posted by RafaelThielmann
only 18, but i'm only a few monts at the job, so you must forgive me...
and... have never slept on the concrete under the wing, but do it on first-class seats and on the MLG doors (when they're open of course)...



Let me tell you something there skippy....

When you are able to check off at least half of those, then you might have something to say on a thread that I post. Most of us have more time bending wrenches on somebody else's chunk of poo than you have making a mess in your own pampers.
I am sorry kid, maybe in Brazil you might be making you daddy proud, but most of us would not want our kids anywhere close to an airport.

You want to be somebody? Don't be an aircraft mechanic!
My avatar is probably the only, most known, aircraft mechanic since the Wright brothers.
You want to make some money any have the possibility of becoming someone...get a degree as an engineer.



...otherwise, good luck.__________________
Yea, so YOU fly it for 2 or 3 hours and you think it is YOURS, but it is MINE when it is broke?

Gatorman you sound like a mad mechanic good for him sleeping in first class seat and not on the concrete . And why would you be a aircraft mechanic and tell some one not to be one? Hate your job? Sound like mabye you should be a engineer.

 

[avbug]

Reading down that list, I find that most of them apply, and most sound painfully familiar...not just as a mechanic, but also as a pilot.

In my case, it's mine when I fly it, and it's mine when it's broken, too. No rest for the wicked.

I can't count the times I've awakened with bits of gravel stuck in my numb face, under a wing. Or the dings I've gotten when I tried to stand up...

Or used safety wire as a toothpick. Or extracted it from my finger, in varying lengths, sizes, and snips.

Anybody ever use needle nose pliers to eat with? Or dedicated a small drawer on a rollaway to snacks...and found that it became the main source of nutrition after too many long hours in the hangar?

I don't drink, so 02 for a hangover has never been an issue, but it's kept me awake on some very long day/night/days.

Wheel chock as a hammer, yes. Hammer as a wheel chock. Yes. Been a wheel chock. Yes.

You know you're a mechanic when you can differentiate between stoddard and avgas by the way it stings the safety wire cuts on your fingers, without even looking.

You know you're a mechanic when your fingers swell and burn by even thinking of solvent or MEK.

You know you're a mechanic when your car is in worse shape than what's being hauled off to the wrecking yard next door.

You know you're a mechanic when you find yourself chasing down the Mac guy on the street, and hiding from the snap-on guy on wednsday afternoons.

You know you're a mechanic when you get your paycheck and you say "when do we get paid?"

You know you're a mechanic when you keep looking at want ads in Subway Sandwich and thinking, "I might be ready for the next step. At least it pays better..."

You know you're a mechanic when your rollaway costs more than your car, your house, and your kids.

You know you're a mechanic when you're paying your ex more for your kids than you can earn with your rollaway.

You know you're a mechanic when you wash your hands before taking a leak.

You know you're a mechanic when you quit reading the sears catalog because you already own everything "craftsman."

You know you're a mechanic when you realize that you can recognize your tools by feel and sight in a box of everyone else's tools, but only pick your kids out of a crowd two out of five times.

You know you're a mechanic when that no longer bothers you.

You know you're a mechanic because it's finally hit home, you've accepted it, and you're just getting over the depression. Remember, it's always darkest just before it goes totally black.

 

[Weasel Keeper]

I've never eaten with my tools...other than when I need a knife maybe. I did have a nice sized side drawer on my box that was mostly dedicated to snacks, candy, mints, cocoa powder for hot chocolate, and spare change for the snack/pop machine. Most of the guys in my shop knew where the candy drawer was.

Here's one:

You know you're a mechanic because the mosquitos only seem to come around when you're in the middle of something complex and can't swat at them (or your hands are covered in wheel/brake gunk, fuel, oil, or hydraulic fluid).