My 1st 6 months as FO

[BRA]

Quotes i have said...either outloud, or to myself my first 6 months as an FO (my first 121 job):

"we can jumpseat on any airline?"
"what is deadheading?"
"it is blowing snow sideways...and it looks like a side ways conveyer belt on the runway".....during a storm at boston a month ago
after reading these boards....."delta scope, J4J, WO's, chapter 11's, liquidations, furloughs, holy $#@% where's the tylenol!!!!!!"
"my epilets are on backwords?"
"man that guy looks warm in the RJ over there" while sitting in my 1900 in LGA
"this cockpit has stickers all over the freaken place"...... MEL items
"we don't get paid for maintance cancellations?"
"i can't believe we present this to the flying public"...apon first going inside of a BE1900C.
"this is like flying around in a nightmare"...riding in the back of a 1900C at night...all the lighting was turned off, and the ceiling on the 1900C is not high enough to stand up in.
"this job is the bottom of the totum pole....and it is still pretty freaken good, you get so many days off"
"no, i'm the pilot...i'm sitting in front"...after i asked people to move farther back in the cabin...a girl sitting in ROW 1 asked if i needed to sit there.
"no in flight meal...but on takeoff we will pitch up about 15 degrees, some M&Ms, and other assorted candies may roll down the isle." ....after getting the inflight meal question

 

[Cardinal]

I'm 4 months into your same position, it's cetainly been worth the effort.

"Yes, I wound the rubberband very tightly this morning"
"I'm afraid not, but we do encourage self-catering"
"I can't beleive they pay me this much!".....when compared with my earnings as a CFI
"I can't believe they pay me this much!".....when compared with just about any other semi-skilled position.
"Ya know what's funny? Those people back there think they are going to die, and there's not a thing we could do to alter that perception"...to the captain, while getting rocked and rolled over the mountains at night.
"Yes, I get to fly the plane"....the inevitable line of discussion after being asked, "are you a copilot?"

 

[Hovernut]

...@ 5 months....

...how do you slow this **CENSORED****CENSORED****CENSORED****CENSORED** thing down....
...never thought 250KIAS would seem soooo slowww...
(climb check) APU...Off, Bleeds...Transferred $hit! (as ears pop) checklist is bass ackwards there...
...what's exceptions frequency again?...
...in range call, "FO call scheduling"....
...(CA) you sure you don't want me to take this landing?"...
...CA while I'm in the flare "Cool! What kind of plane is that!" (Antonov)...
...wearing a cool leather jacket... couldn't resist

Having the time of my life and loving every minute of it. Finally have enough seniority on reserve to not get called! Feeling guilty for getting paid to sleep late and laze around the apt.

 

[BRA]

After finding out we were #21 for departure at laquardia, in my beech 1900: "man, it is gonna be 50 minutes before we get off the ground, then another hour or so to our destination...and i could use the bathroom right now......this one is gonna be a photo finish, yes sir."

A little girl in laquardia asked: why is this plane so small!!??....in my head: "cause you're going to a hick town!"

 

[KingAirKiddo]

"cause you're going to a hick town"...now that's funny....next time why don't you say it out loud and tell us what the reaction is

 

[T-Gates]

"230 to the marker.....we can do that?"

"Wait, you're telling ME to slow down?"

(call from Dispatch) "Be advised, the captian is done, but the FO is going back to Nassau." DAMMIT!

(call from scheduling at 5:00am) "Lemme get this straight, you want me at the airport in 1 hour to repo. a plane to MIA, ride in a van back to FLL and then begin my 3-day trip!?"

"I never realized that the 1900 is ATC's playtoy" After getting the slam-dunk into MIA.


--03M

This has the potential to be a real good thread.......

 

[Jetscream32]

I had a full year before the furlough.....


The training instructor in ground school had asked on his first day... Where are the magnetos?

So you're an airline pilot, I bet you make a lot of money! (always makes me laugh)

Can this plane make it all the way to Lexington (KY)? Yes ma'am we just fed the hamsters.

My favorite was shutting the door on the mighty Jetstream then getting a DOOR light in the cockpit while taxiing out, the captain stops and I get up and go to the back. Reset the door and see all the looks on the faces as I squeeze back into the cockpit. No one said a thing.

Are you sure we can fly in this weather, it looks bad. (As they are climbing on board under their own power)

To go along with the above....Is this plane safe? In my head...No but get on anyway and we will try to make it this time without falling from the sky.

Are you old enough to fly? I said this around the time the commercial was playing regularly...... "No but I did stay at the Holiday Inn last night."

Seeing some guy taking a leak while the back door of the 'Stream was still open. (The lav has a door that simply blocks the rest of the cabin hence the back door must be shut)

Passenger (P) I'm a private pilot, do you mind if I sit in the front seat and listen in.

Me: No go ahead and plug in.

P: (on takeoff roll taps me on the shoulder I didn't turn around until we were at cruise)

Me: Yes sir did you need something?

P: Your VSI is broken we should go back.

Me: Actually you are looking at the cabin VSI which controls the rate at which the cabin pressurizes and yes it is MEL'd.

P: This little thing is pressurized?

Two weeks later the same guy on the same flight asks the captain if he can plug in (same captain). Captain says, sorry sir that seat is blocked of for weight and balance please take the most rearward seat possible. I almost lost it.

Can't wait to get back to work so I can get some more material!!!

 

[T-Gates]

I think the 19 seaters have the best stories.

My favorite was after we landed in Key West, a lady got to the top of the stairs and put her bag on the first step. As she reached into the coat closet to get her other bag, the bag on the step fell over and fell to the ground with a large "CRUNCH". She looked at me and screamed, "Why didn't you catch that!?" I said "Sorry mam, I couldn't dive in time." She didn't catch the sarcasm and came down the stairs, looked at me and screamed "You are the $hittiest flight attendant ever!"

I laughed harder than I ever had before.

--03M