Infidelity

[wolf]

Hey guys,

I'm not in the military, but have a friend that's in the active Reserves in Iraq currently. This person is married with children and is having trouble with the close contact between men and women serving together, and is doubting whether they can stay faithful to their spouse. They are in danger daily, have a lot of responsibility, and are 4 months into a year (at least) tour of duty.

Does anyone have any advice, this person is struggling to keep their commitment under some unique circumstances. Has anyone here been there?

 

[HueyPilot]

Affairs and the military...not smart

I'm certainly not the type to be judging anyone else's marriage, but it is a fact that the military (and the Air Force in particular) doesn't take kindly to affairs. Like it or not, there is an element of the military that is quite zealous in prosecuting morality issues.

I have personally seen a fellow pilot get charged with adultery, and despite the fact that he slept with a non-military chick, and he and his wife worked out the problem, the Air Force prosecuted him and kicked him out with an other than honorable discharge. Completely screwed his future too.

Is it right to be so aggressive? I don't think so. But that's the way it is. So I'd tell your friend to be very careful, and think before he does anything he might regret.

 

[hovermode]

Faithful?

If this person is really having trouble staying faithful. Then regardless of the situation, they are going to stray. Tell your friend to seek the advice of the Squadron chaplin. He should remember his vows to his spouse and think about his actions and their consequenses. sp? This is just my opinion. Good Luck to your friend.

 

[Snakum]

Been there ... done that ... made the WRONG move. Have him go to the Chaplain, even if he's not Christian. I figure if the Army is smoking folks for that stuff (and they are), the Air Force will probably CRUCIFY you for it.

Besides, the best piece of @ss in the world isn't worth losing your family over. I don't care if that p@ssy's lined with gold and platinum. It ain't worth the hassle. In six months she'll be a nagging old b!tch anyway, so why change up if there's no money in it?

One word ... Masturbation. Cheaper ... no lawyers.

Minh
(Gee ... I wish I'd been this smart when I was younger. )

 

[Eagleflip]

Gawd, Snakum...

You slay me...

 

[jaxgus]

Seen This Before

One of the best pieces of advice you can give your friend is how is he/she going to look at themsleves in the mirror the next morning. The infidielity can occur, the lawyers/JAG get involved or no one finds out. Regardless of the public outcome, your friend will always know that they cheated on their spouse. This is the biggest personal cost that occurs when you cheat. It is a LIFETIME cost for one or two moments of physical fulfillment.

Additionally, if they have chilldren, each time they look in the mirror they will be forced to deal with the fact they cheated on their childrens mother/father. This is a tremendous personal burden for many and it will always haunt them.

No one has the right to judge someone who cheats on their spouse. We don't know the background of their marriage, whether or not the husband and wife have an arrangement that allows outside relationships or personal stress which is relieved by physical relationships outside of marriage. If I were you, I'd pass on the advice to your friend that the lifetime memory of cheating on their spouse for a one night stand is not worth it. I worked side-by-side with lady fighter pilots for the majority of my USAF career. We lived in common billets for months on end in hostile territory and infidelity was not reqiured. Just my humble opinion.

jaxgus

 

[ThomasR]

Your friend must have a lot of time on his hands there in Iraq to be worried about infidelity. Most everything in the military [Army] takes planning and that would include having an affair. The only time you are alone is when you go take a dump and in a combat environment you are not alone even then. Something is amiss that you don't know about. Best ask your friend to be more specific.