Practice, practice, practice! Whenever you can, grab family and friends and teach them random flying stuff. They might get sick of it after a while, but until then use them as your guinea pigs and you'll start seeing what makes sense, and what works and what doesn't. Constantly be asking the student questions that checks if he understands what you just said. Don't just ask them if they understand, but ask them questions that actually check.
Watch some WWII training videos. Out of necessity, the military was an expert at teaching flying concepts to average joes in order to mobilize a war machine. Some of the stuff is really great. They relate flying concepts to the things the students already do, like riding bikes and driving cars. You need to get into the mind of the student, and approach everything to fit the worldview formed by his background.
As a new CFI, I am still going through this process, and it's funny how you need to add "psychologist" to the long list of disciplines you need to become a jack of all trades at. (meteorologist, teacher, physicist, mechanic, lawyer, etc.)
I've found that in general, I carry across ideas a lot better if I don't just serve them on a platter, but hand the student the loose ends and make him connect them. I do as much of my teaching as I can by asking questions, which act as hints and clues. I give the student the presuppositions, and leve him to make the inference. If he goes through the mental legwork to figure it out, it sticks much better and in the end he probably understands it on a higher level.
For example, whene explaining the relationship between lift, speed, and AOA, (assuming we've already gone over the 4 forces and Newton's laws) I'll first ask the student to tell me evey factor that can change lift, and as he starts brainstorming them (going from things he might or might not have picked up along the way up to that point) I write down every item he names off as I poke and prod him.
Me: "When your hand's out the car window going down the freeway, what happens when you turn it slightly?"
Student: "Oh, angle of attack"
etc.
Once everything's on the board, I zero in on the items you can control directly as a pilot, airspeed and AOA. Go over how each one affects lift. I'll then drive in the concept that lift stays the same in straight & level flight at all speeds:
Me: "when is lift greater, when you're fast or when you're slow?"
Student: "when you're fast, of course!"
Me: "but if lift increases, then there's a disbalance of forces... if you start pushing up on the plane stronger than the weight is pulling down, what's gonna start happening?"
Student: "Oh, you'll start climbing" (If he doesn't say that, then I'll ask some more leading questions until he does. But don't take this to ridiculous lengths. There is a point at which if he doesn't get it, just tell him. If you spend 5 minutes asking more and more basic questions going down to kindergarten level, you'll make him feel stupid and discourage him)
Me: "Good, that's right. But we want a constant altitude, so the forces have to stay balanced. If weight stays the same, lift has to...."
Student: "... stay the same!"
Me: "Good. So, (going back to the stuff on the board) If airspeed increases, which by itself would increase lift, something else has to change so lift stays the same. What else can we do?
Student: (hopefully figures out the only thing left, reducing AOA. If he doesn't, once again, ask leading questions and give him hints until he does.)
Once he figures out the solution to that little sample scenario, then I'd go to the bigger picture of how airspeed and AOA have an inverse relationship, and if one goes up the other must go down to keep total lift the same, and tie it all together, filling any gaps.
Another sample conversation about why you shouldn't gun carburated engines not equipped with an accelerator pump. (assuming basic concepts of the carb and mixture are already covered)
Me: "... so we always want to maintain the same ratio of fuel and air regarless of the power setting, right?"
Student: "...right"
Me: "When opening the throttle rapidly, which would tend to accelerate faster, the air flow or fuel flow?"
Student: "I dunno."
Me: "What's easier to push around, a SUV or a golf cart?"
Student: "A golf cart, of course"
Me: "Why?"
Student: "it's lighter"
Me: "What's lighter, air or fuel?"
Student: (light bulb goes on)
Then I'd tell the story of how another student of mine freaked out on a go-around, slammed open the throttle, and the engine quit due to the overlean condition.
Good luck in your training and teaching. Let me know if you have any other questions. Use any opportunity to practice teaching. Try to do other CFIs' ground lessons for their students under their supervision. Anything.
P.S. I agree with 7574ever that you need to lose the "second to none" attitude. I don't know if it was intentional or not, but it won't win you many friends. A healthy dose of humility goes a long way.
